Thursday, May 31, 2012

"Invalid thread": Is marriage of two people, one or both of whom is homosexual, but of opposite sex possible?

I
I was told not when discussing on the now closed thread homosexual marriage. Here is the answer I tried to post there:

---Quote (Originally by TarkanAttila)---
Ah... this can be true, in a sense. I wonder, though, does this mean that anyone who has had children can get married and never have children again? :confused:

But why would a homosexual man want to marry a woman? Part of being married is having sex. IIRC, a marriage can be annulled on the grounds that they never had sex.
---End Quote---


They would have to intend to have children.

The homosexual one would have to decide if sex with the mother of his child or total chastity is the heavier or lighter way of repenting for previous sodomitic life.

Both parties would have to know of his homosexual past.

I have in Swedish recommended Mr Gardell and Mr Levengood to separate, for Mr Gardell to marry the mother of Amos Gardell and Mr Levengood to marry the other woman in that lesbian relationship.

That was when I still believed Mr Gardell had had sex with the mother of Amos, and that therefore it was clear that he rather than Levengood was the father. Later a gay liberal who was also gay told me there was another possibility. It was the same guy whose hatred of John Paul II made me feel Karol Wojtyla was still dying a Christian death as he was cursed by those guys, even if he had not been Orthodox enough to be a Pope.

Anyway, I believe that scenario is licit. At least far more so than remaining in sodomitic relationships. And that is as already stated one of my grounds not to want such relationships to get status of marriage with all the divorce red tape that makes for.

Note: Gardell, Levengood and their son, and the fact that he the other weeks is staying "with two mothers" (but not who these are) is public knowledge in Sweden, it is not like divulging personal secrets. Gardell is a published author and a recognised gay icon in Sweden.

II
Posted by: St Francis
On: May 29, '12 8:20 am

Catholics do not believe in forced marriage. If a woman becomes pregnant outside of marriage and the two parents marry only because of the child, then that can be grounds for annullment.

However, if a homosexual is able to complete the marital act with a spouse (obviously of the opposite sex), then a marriage is possible, and has apparently happened many times!

III
Posted by: rossum
On: May 29, '12 11:36 am

Indeed it has. There is even a word for it: beard.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beard_(companion)

IV
Posted by: TheRealJuliane
On: May 29, '12 11:52 am

That term does not imply that the two people - the SSA person and the heterosexual person - are having sexual intercourse. They could be dating as a couple in order to throw off the "scent" of reporters hounding the SSA person. That used to happen in Hollywood although many times, it fooled absolutely no one.

It is a myth that gay men cannot have heterosexual sex. Many of them can. It happens.

But long-term, marriage to a gay person is not healthy for the straight person. Very difficult for the gay person to stay faithful, unless (and it's a very big unless) he has worked to leave that life behind. Otherwise, heartache, as well as possible exposure to life-threatening STDs will ensue.

V
Posted by: BlueEyedLady
On: May 29, '12 12:02 pm

That should never happen. It is devastating to the straight partner. I was engaged to a gay man and it destroyed me when he came out. Imagine finding out that the life you were building with the person you love was a complete and total lie. He was never even attracted to me. I feel even worse for peoe who find out after years of marriage and children.

I will say this though, he was a good and strong enough man to be faithful to me.

VI
Posted by: St Francis
On: May 29, '12 1:33 pm

I would definitely say that there should be total openness about this before the couple goes any further than simply considering marrriage.

I was thinking about the situation in the first post, not those where someone hides such an important fact from the other. If that is done, efforts must be made that the other never find out.

VII
Posted by: TheRealJuliane
On: May 29, '12 4:51 pm

---Quote (Originally by BlueEyedLady)---
That should never happen. It is devastating to the straight partner. I was engaged to a gay man and it destroyed me when he came out. Imagine finding out that the life you were building with the person you love was a complete and total lie. He was never even attracted to me. I feel even worse for peoe who find out after years of marriage and children.

I will say this though, he was a good and strong enough man to be faithful to me.
---End Quote---


It is devastating indeed. I'm very sorry that happened to you. It hurts to be rejected for another man, as well. A special kind of pain.

VIII
Myself on new thread after previous was deleted, my post is equal to here I + VIII:

Answering stray comments directed at this when the thread was previously up:

Catholics do not believe in forced marriage. If a woman becomes pregnant outside of marriage and the two parents marry only because of the child, then that can be grounds for annullment.


Forced marriage? No. If the father was takento that wedding under shot gun because of his child, that would be a ground for annulment. If he married the child's mother because it was his duty and he wanted to do that, and if he intended ordinary marital intercourse and being faithful, that would not be a ground for annulment.

That should never happen. It is devastating to the straight partner. I was engaged to a gay man and it destroyed me when he came out.


Saying one has feelings one has not if other partner is likely to build marriage or marriage intention on those feelings is of course a ground of annulment for the other person, since entering matrimony without knowing the intention of the other is doing it unvoluntarily, as when entering a trap.

I would not be very attracted to women who are so very feminine as to not realise what one was talking about: this one had a sad story but no idea it was another subject.

As for finding out one's wife is lesbian it may be less devastating to a man. Roy Campbell (according to a wiki article, I think) found that out about his wife, punished her, and the marriage went on.

http://www.webcitation.org/684BX8uqh

2 comments:

Hans Georg Lundahl said...

Totally a case in point.

The guy is a Mormon, but the story could have happened among Catholics until recently - when priests started to study "psychology" in seminar instead of I-II:

Club Unicorn: I am a gay, devout Mormon, happily married to a woman, with three children

by Josh Weed

www.lifesitenews.com/news/club-unicorn-i-am-a-gay-devout-mormon-happily-married-to-a-woman-with-three

Hans Georg Lundahl said...

His story is also a proof I am not gay, primarily. Because it includes a test that I passed the other way:

Camilla, unknown girl as far as name is concerned, Mikaela ...

Anna, Heidi, Ida, Anna Kristina, Alexandra, Éléonore, Mélissa, Charlène, Laetitia, Loren ...

(No official girl friends included, just girls who were not dating me but whom I had wanted to do so, no boy in sight, unless you count a week when I was stupid enough to garble romance with love for Jesus: previous resolution, not to be in love with St Theresa of Child Jesus, because she belongs to him, but rather to share her love, subsequent resolution, not to share her love anyway, and to think Spiritual Song was not written for monks but for nuns.)

The two series start when I was fourteen and when I was 27: during first part, I flared for age peers, during second part rather for 15 years younger than me.